What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I just found a bag of teeth...
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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