The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
we made out on top of his cat.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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