id be glad to
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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