God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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