the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I FOUND THE LEGS
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
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