brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
