everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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