Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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