His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
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