we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
