Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
