he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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