your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
