literally had 100 drinks last night.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
