just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
operation have a gay friend backfired
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
