i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
