yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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