Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
