found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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