do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize