My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Randomize
