it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
