so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Randomize
