I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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