After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
