"it" just moved
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I think people are normalizing furries
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize