you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Randomize
