i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
