So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize