Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
