You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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