I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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