I have demons in me.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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