ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
