Can Purell be used as lube?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
