Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
