I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Randomize
