Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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