You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
