ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
my poor anus
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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