Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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