There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize