yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize