I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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