i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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