your room smells of hookers.
And success
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
