You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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