I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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