The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
and eventually we just all took our pants off
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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