The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
