omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
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